Evening everyone!
So, any of you who know me or have heard me talk at any length (and it is often at considerable length) are likely aware that I live with ADHD. I was diagnosed towards the end of 2022 after two years of fighting for a diagnosis. I don’t mind telling you all that I damn near wept the day I got my diagnosis confirmed over the phone. I wrote a more lengthy post about this on my Facebook page on the day, but I’ll refer back to the relevant bits as I go here.
So we come to today.
I was idly checking notifications on my phone this afternoon (instead of doing anything I was actually supposed to be doing, of course!) and saw that my Facebook memories contained the aforementioned post from last year.
It was (and currently still is) a year ago to the day that I received my diagnosis…that sure as hell crept up on me!
I have learned SO much about myself over the last year. There are more ways in which my neurological differences affect me than I ever realised and I’m constantly learning more and more. So many things that seem completely unrelated all begin to make sense once you understand how they exist under ADHD’s umbrella.
I was (partially) wrong about one thing this time last year, though. In my post, I said:
”There is a sense of grief that comes with knowing that things might have been very different had there been earlier intervention and I know from my own research that the grief will likely feel more profound once my medication starts and begins to help me”.
Whilst I do still grieve for the way my younger self was misunderstood, mislabelled and very often dismissed by other people (some of whom really should have known better), starting my medication was mostly accompanied by a sense of overwhelming joy. Like someone turned down the volume a bit and now I can hear myself think in peace.
I’ve learned a lot about how to take better care of myself now that I’m more in tune with what my needs are as someone living with ADHD - earplugs for overstimulating environments, self-compassion, a good night’s rest (tough for gigging musicians!) and above all, awareness of what my brain is up to at any one given moment. I’m also much better at communicating my struggles and needs with other people and learning to be less of a people-pleaser and to be more honest with others about when my struggles are going to affect them.
I’ve got so much more to learn and I’ll likely carry on learning until the day I drop, but I’ve found SO many amazing people in the ADHD community this last year who are doing incredible things to help others with their struggles, as well as many more who are being warriors with their own difficulties and differences who inspire me EVERY DAY.
I know I’m in good hands.